What Black Women Get to Be

People have a lot of opinions about what Black women are supposed to say and do and how we're supposed to move in the world. 🙄

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Malcolm X said: “The most disrespected person in America is the Black woman. The most unprotected person in America is the Black woman. The most neglected person in America is the Black woman.” 

Those 30 words uttered in 1962, summarize far too many of our experiences today as Black women in this country. Everywhere we go, we face unprecedented pushback. Everywhere we go, whispers and screams echo that we’re incompetent — no matter our degrees, experiences or accomplishments to the contrary. Everywhere we go, hints, smirks and outright disrespect seem to convey that whatever it is we have, we didn’t earn and don’t deserve. Like saying Vice President Kamala Harris is a “#DEI hire.”

Vice President Kamala Harris is the presumptive Democratic nominee for president. The election is Nov. 5.

Everywhere Black women go, we have to contend with the misogynoir and lesser mortals’ ideas about who we are and how we’re supposed to act, look, sound, respond, think and feel. We might have to contend with other people’s prejudiced notions about us, but that doesn’t mean it requires us to do anything differently than whatever we choose to do and however we choose to react.

No matter what we do, sometimes the disrespect that seems inherent in our dealings with the world can result in deadly consequences. #SayHerName #SonyaMassey.

After a lifetime of marginalization, I’ve leveled up to unapologetically Blackity Black, and that can mean whatever it is you think it means. I said what I said with my whole chest because the Iowa Nice, once enculturated within me, is on its last flicker, and I’m not the only one.

We clap back. 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

Harris, the presumptive Democratic nominee, told former president Donald Trump, who was convicted of 34 felonies: “If you’ve got something to say, say it to my face,” about debating her. That’s how we’d say it.

The next time you see Black women in public and your biases flare up because we’re not behaving according to the stereotypes running in your head, consult this cheat sheet for what Black women are allowed to be — which is anything we’d like to be. Your input isn’t necessary.

We are allowed to be:

Angry

Depressed

Aggressive

Attitudinal

Hurt

Confused

Irritable

Loud

Skeptical

In pain

Pregnant

Childless

Defensive

Sick and Tired

Exhausted

Short-tempered

Left tf alone

Supportive

Quiet

Unbothered

Unapologetic

Carefree

Relaxed

At peace

Unparalleled

Understood

Free

The boss

Good

Comical

Confused

Capable

Argumentative

Wealthy

Poor

Kind

Raggedy

Street

Well-dressed

Emotional

In First Class

Natural

Permed

Nappy

Perfectly coiffed

Bitter

Assertive

Intellectual

Meek

Lost

The life of the party

Blessed

Neurodivergent

Political

Joyous

Spiritual

Nurturing

At the top of our game

Selfish

Sweet

Enough

Friendly

Standoffish

Critical

Talented

Thinkers

Respectable

Disrespectful

Ordinary

Mean

Collegiate

Gifted

Protected

Powerful

Admired

Whatever tf we want to be

✅President.

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The Iowa Writers Collaborative

Nicole Baart: This Stays Here, Sioux Center

Rekha Basu: Shousts and whispers, Des Moines

Ray Young Bear: From Red Earth Drive, Meskwaki Settlement

Laura Belin: Iowa Politics with Laura Belin, Windsor Heights

Tory Brecht: Brecht’s Beat, Quad Cities

Dartanyan L. Brown: My Integrated Live, Des Moines

Douglas Burns: The Iowa Mercury, Carroll

Jane Burns: The Crossover, Des Moines

Dave Busiek: Dave Busiek on Media, Des Moines

Rachelle Chase : Reading with Rachelle, Ottumwa

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Art Cullen: Art Cullen’s Notebook, Storm Lake

Suzanna de Baca: Dispatches from the Heartland, Huxley

Taylor Decker: Taylor’s Millennial Mindset, Sioux City

Debra Engle: A Whole New World, Madison County

Randy Evans: Stray Thoughts, Des Moines via Bloomfield

Daniel P. Finney: Paragraph Stacker, Des Moines

Marianne Fons: Reporting From Quiltropolis, Winterset

Arnold Garson: Second Thoughts, Okoboji and Sioux Falls

Julie Gammack: Julie Gammack’s Iowa Potluck, Des Moines and Okoboji

Chris Gloninger: Weathering Climate Change, US

Dennis Goldford: Let’s Talk Politics, Clive

Avery Gregurich: The Five and Dime, Marengo

Fern Kupfer and Joe Geha: Fern and Joe, Ames

Rob Gray's Area: Rob Gray’s Area, Ankeny

Nik Heftman: The Seven Times, Iowa

Beth Hoffman: In the Dirt, Lovilla

Phoebe Wall Howard : Shifting Gears, Detroit,

Iowa Capital Dispatch, an alliance with IWC

Iowa Podcasters' Collaborative

Iowa Writers Collaborative Roundup Sunday Roundup

Black Iowa News: Dana James, Iowa

Chris Jones: Chris’s Substack, Iowa City

Pat Kinney: View from Cedar Valley, Waterloo

Robert Leonard: Deep Midwest: Politics and Culture, Bussey

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Darcy Maulsby: Keepin’ It Rural, Calhoun County

Hola Iowa: Iowa

Alison McGaughey: The Inquisitive Quad Citizen, Quad Cities

Kurtis Meyer: Showing Up, St. Ansgar

Relatively Minor: by Vicki Minor, Winterset

Wini Moranville: Wini’s Food Stories, Des Moines

Jeff Morrison: Between Two Rivers, Cedar Rapids

Kyle Munson: Kyle Munson’s Main Street, Des Moines

Jane Nguyen: The Asian Iowan, West Des Moines

John Naughton: My Life in Color, Des Moines

Chuck Offenburger: Iowa Boy Chuck Offenburger, Jefferson and Des Moines

Barry Piatt: Piatt on Politics Behind the Curtain, Washington, D.C.

Dave Price: Dave Price’s Perspective, Des Moines

Ty Rushing: Coming Soon, Iowa City

Steve Semken: Ice Cube Press, LLC, North Liberty

Macey Shofroth: The Midwest Creative, Norwalk

Larry Stone: Listening to the Land, Elkader

Mary Swander: Mary Swander’s Buggy Land, Kalona

Mary Swander's Emerging Voices: Emerging Voices, Kalona

Cheryl Tevis: Unfinished Business, Boone County

Bill Tubbs : Impressions, Eldridge

Ed Tibbetts: Along the Mississippi, Davenport

Jason Walsmith: The Racontourist, Earlham

Kali White VanBaale: 988: Mental Healthcare in Iowa, Bondurant

Teresa Zilk: Talking Good, Des Moines